Keiry Barahona

Hi, my name is Keiry Barahona. I was born in Honduras, in 1992. My first childhood memories are marked by domestic violence and I really wish I didn’t remember how my father mistreated my mother. The precarious condition of our family broke my heart and produced a deep fear in me towards my father. My brother and I grew up in a dysfunctional household environment full of violence, conflict, hatred, selfishness…etc. We were a broken family that lacked a healthy paternal figure. This reality affected my emotional growth and damage my personality later on.

When I was 8 or 9 years old, I remember experiencing a deep agony as I imagined what could happen to my mother. This idea filled my heart with a deep fear of losing my loved ones. My mind was so vulnerable that any thought would hurt me deeply and I felt powerless to fight them. My innocence was taken from me at a very early age. I saw things that I shouldn’t have which damaged my mind and caused a lot of confusion in me. I was very insecure, fearful and felt very much alone. I carried this burden alone because I couldn’t share any of it with my mother. My father left and then my parents got divorced which broke my heart even more. Our finances were also severely affected by these circumstances and mother had to work more to provide for me and my brother. I can see now that God never left us and that he took care of us.

I couldn’t change my life, even knowing that what I was doing was wrong I couldn’t stop.

When I was 13 my mother came to Spain looking for a way out. My brother and I stayed in Honduras which made me feel even worse because now my mother was also gone. I didn’t have my parents with me and felt abandoned and unprotected. Everything that I had experienced until then came out causing strong defiance against our caretaker. I started to make my own decisions thinking that I didn’t need to be kept accountable for anything. I met a young man and I held on to him as if he was the answer to the emptiness I felt inside. Thus, he became my everything. But as the night approached all my fears would torture me. My communication with my brother was very damaged because we have hurted each other very much. After a while our relationship was completely broken and I didn’t even care. My heart was indifferent and cold because I was suppressing my emotions. I asked God for help since I realized that I couldn’t continue as I was any longer. I couldn’t change my life. I knew that what I was doing was wrong, but I couldn’t stop.

At that time a real desire to change started to grow inside of me. I knew that only God could change me. When I was 18 years old my mother went to Honduras to take us to  Spain so that we could be with her. Adjusting to a new country was very difficult. My boyfriend came to Spain after a while and I followed him whenever he went learning the most horrible and ugly things anyone could learn. Torturing thoughts continued to fill my mind damaging my life to a point in which I lost my sanity. I was a prisoner of my thoughts, my emotions and my own rebellion. I wished I had the ability to avoid waking up in the mornings since my life was a never ending agony. My mother took me to very good psychologists, but none of them could help me and their treatments would not have any effect on me. I quit my job and I isolated myself. I chose to live for me and I asked God to take me with him and let me die.

Yes! God was taking me out of a deep hole 

One day my psychologist called to let me know that she had found a rehabilitation program in Pamplona. She really thought that I could get the help that I needed there, so I went for the sake of my family. They welcomed me with so much love that I could see Jesus’ love through them. As I think about it now I remember the Bible verse “I had only heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes.” I felt loved, respected, dignified, they made me feel like I’ve known them all my life. They generously provided for all my needs without any conditions and it continues that way until today.

That is how I found God’s love. I accepted Christ in my heart and now he is teaching me how to fight against those distressing thoughts, fears, rebellion, and many other things that made my life miserable. Yes! God was taking me out of the hole I was in and hope began to fill my heart. I fell in love with Jesus, and I could no longer live without him. He became my everything and the reason I lived for. I learned to live under his authority and to obey out of love and gratitude. Now, I am his daughter because Christ lives in me and he loves me like a father. He has promised to always be with me, to protect me, take care of me, correct me…

Now, everytime I face those distressing thoughts I am learning to fight them because Christ is fighting with me, and he always wins. He has made me more than a conqueror. Because of what he has done for me I can now rejoice, dance, smile, love, forgive, and teach others how to get out of the hole they are in and follow the Lord Jesus.

I would like to finish this testimony thanking God for setting his eyes on me, giving me salvation and bringing life to my heart. He loved me so much that he didn’t stop searching for me until he found me.

I would also like to express my deepest gratitude to our pastor, his wife and family and to each staff member at Vida Nueva. I am grateful for the love, advice, and dedication that I received whenever I needed it. I have truly found in this center a real home and a real family.

Thank you God for your good plans for my life. I give you all the glory!!